haha... think i'm becoming more and more of a MCP... once again, i guess i have to constantly remind myself tt i'm not tt great to affect a person's life. i'm just a nobody and i really hope to remain tt way...

so i went to collect my cert today? 7kyu... no idea to be happy or not... happy? it's an average rank, so i'm not afraid to lose face when i lose someone... saded? coz there's a few whom i've beaten and even thrashed.. and they got the same rank... wad does this mean? i'm the same as them?? kinda troubled over this... well.. i feel i'm better. hated them.. their playing method.. darn greedy... price to pay for greedy is losing... but same rank!? wtf.... argh... guess i'll work harder to surpass them.. surpass myself... reaching to dan level..

have been going out with a particular someone... these few weeks... have been kinda telling her about me? no idea if it's good or bad.. maybe finally after such a long time there's a new person who understands and know the real me? yeah.. it's kind of sad for me to say that i'm putting a mask since sec 2... donning on another when i'm in year one... so i told her questions of 'if' which is most likely to happen... coz tt's the real me...

i guess i really got lost when i tried to be someone i'm not... it was only today when i had a chat with someone that made me realise who i am and who i'm not...

the thought of losing someone whom i can finally call friend sends a shiver down my spine. maybe she's more then a friend? a good friend maybe? yeah... but no wish to keep her in the dark... there's still a long road to road.. i noe.. weird analogy.... she'll know who i'm really is all about me.. so i guess it's better to me frank with her now?

was glad to noe her reply of 'so?' and i really hope she really mean it... i mean.. i've been putting up a false front for about month? so sorry to burst the little bubble of yours and giving you the impression of something i'm not...