In serious dilemmia. I think I'll blog this in serious english.

I've no idea whether if it's 'like' or is it 'infatuation'. *sigh* I think I'm relying and using my brain too much. My heart tells me that I like her, but my mind tells me it's a waste of time. Is it because that I have many things that I've not done? Or is it because she's not my type? Or is it that I still cannot foget that 'her'?

I don't know what to do next. it's creating a barrier inside me. I can't focus. It such a troublesome stuff. I told myself I can't get into this kind of stuff. But I can't stop myself.

Did badly in basketball today. Not motivated to run at all.. Was thikning about the stuff... All my shots are off angle.

I guess I'll give us more time. But more time to think? So that I can delude myself that I don't like her? I just hope that she'll reject me. Disappoint me.

She isn't my type at all. I don't want to say what my type is, she may be reading, she may change herself, that's what I don't want. It's sometimes weird how life can get. I don't want to hurt her. Make her feel that I'm cheating of her feelings. Yes, we've converse on the phone, sms-ed each other, IM-each other. I think that's what causing the dilemmia. The closer we are, the further I feel we're apart.